Fuck you Android Framework
Fuck you Android Framework for those horrible XML I have to write for each screen density. Fuck you for your useless layout editor that generates spaghetti code every time I change something. Fuck you for that Constraint Layout which is the most unused library till this date.
Fuck you for those horrible core components like activities and fragments. Fuck Android OS that can not even manage state changes by itself. Fuck you for those TransactionTooLargeException. I can’t even simply pass the data between UI. Oh, I forgot to fuck all those IllegalStateException from FragmentManager. Fuck you for making me so ill to write this fucking boilerplate code for content providers.
750 grams well-layered, skin-on pork belly
2 pig ears (about 350 grams in total)
Cooking oil, as needed
1 onion (about 220 grams), chopped
2 garlic cloves, finely chopped
200 grams chicken livers, finely chopped
4-8 red bird’s-eye chillies (or more to taste), chopped
1 green banana chilli, cut into 5mm pieces
About 20ml fish sauce
About 20ml fresh calamansi juice
About 30ml vinegar (distilled white, rice or
Fine sea salt and fresh ground black pepper
Fresh calamansi limes, halved
1-2 3mm-thick slices of red onion, chopped
2 eggs (use only one if serving half the recipe)
Use a butane (or propane) torch to singe off the hairs on the pig ears and the skin of the pork belly. Rinse the ears and belly with water. Fill a large pot about three-quarters of the way with water, add about 10 grams of salt and bring to the boil. Add the belly and ears, bring to the boil, then lower the heat and simmer for about 90 minutes, or until the pieces are tender enough to be easily pierced with a paring knife. Remove the belly and ears from the water and as soon as they’re cool enough to handle, finely chop them.
Heat a wok or pan (preferably well-seasoned cast-iron or carbon steel) over a medium-high flame. If using cast-iron or carbon steel, rub oil very lightly into the interior; if using stainless steel, add about 20ml of cooking oil, or more as needed to prevent the pork from sticking. When the wok/pan is hot, add the chopped belly and ears and cook, stirring frequently. The fat will start to render out of the pieces, which will turn brown and crisp. Remove the solids from the pan, leaving behind as much fat as possible. If there’s more than about 30ml of fat, pour off some of it; if there’s less than 30ml of fat, add cooking oil to the pan. Heat it over a medium flame then add the onion and garlic and cook, stirring often, until the onion is soft. Add the pork back to the pan, season it lightly with salt and stir it until it starts to sizzle. Mix in the chicken liver, red and green chillies, fish sauce, calamansi juice, vinegar and some black pepper. Stir constantly until the chicken liver is cooked, then taste for seasoning and adjust as needed. Scoop the sisig onto a hot, lightly oiled sizzler platter (or a plate) then scatter the red onion pieces on top. Make two craters in the sisig then crack two eggs and put one into each indentation. Drizzle with mayonnaise (if using) and add several fresh calamansi pieces. Squeeze the juice from the calamansi, then mix in the egg and mayonnaise.
600 grams cooked long-grain rice, chilled
10 garlic cloves, chopped
About 45ml cooking oil (or lard)
Fine sea salt
Use dampened hands to break up any lumps of rice. Put 45ml of oil (or lard) in a wok, add the garlic and heat over a low flame until the garlic is medium golden. Watch it carefully and stir frequently so it doesn’t burn. Use a slotted skimmer to scoop the garlic from the pan, leaving behind the fat. Heat the wok over a medium-high flame, add the rice, season with salt and mix in about three-quarters of the fried garlic. Stir-fry until the rice is hot, adding more oil or lard if needed to prevent it from sticking to the pan. Scoop the rice into a serving bowl and scatter the reserved garlic on top.
This was a recipe that originated in Bailystok Poland and brought to New York by Eastern European Immigrants.These were once well known in New York delicatessens ( mainly in Manhattan’s Lower East Side) and a favorite of the Jewish community. It’s not really known outside of New York because of its short self life which does not lend itself being shipped all over the country.These are similar to a bagel but there is no hole in the middle just a depression which is filled with onion, garlic or poppy seeds. It can be likened to the onion pletzel. Can also be made in different sizes from 3-4 inches to the size of a small pizza.
- 1 teaspoon olive oil or 1 teaspoon vegetable oil
- 1 1⁄2 teaspoons poppy seeds
- 1⁄3 cup onion, minced
- 1⁄2 teaspoon kosher salt, coarse
- 2 cups water, warm divided (110 to 115 degrees)
- 7 g active dry yeast
- 2 teaspoons sugar
- 2 1⁄4 teaspoons salt
- 1 3⁄4 cups bread flour
- 3 1⁄2 cups all-purpose flour
- Cover two baking sheets with parchment paper and sprinkle lightly with cornmeal. Prepare Onion Topping:.
- In a small bowl, combine vegetable or olive oil, poppy seeds, onions, and salt; set aside, set aside.
- In a large bowl, combine 1/2 cup water, yeast, and sugar; let stand 10 minutes or until foamy.
- Add remaining 1 1/2 cups water, salt, bread flour, and all-purpose flour.
- Knead by hand or with dough hook of mixer for 8 minutes until smooth (the dough will be soft).
- Add flour if you think the dough is too moist , a tablespoon at a time.
- If the dough is looking dry, add warm water, a tablespoons at a time.
- Form dough into a ball and place in a lightly oiled bowl, turning to oil all sides. Cover with plastic wrap and let rise 1 1/2 hours or until tripled in bulk. Punch dough down in bowl, turn it over, cover with plastic wrap, and let rise another 45 minutes or until doubled in bulk.
- On a floured board or counter, punch dough down and roll into a log.
- With a sharp knife, cut log into 8 rounds. Lay dough rounds flat on a lightly floured board, cover with a towel, and let them rest 10 minutes.
- Gently pat each dough round into circles (a little higher in the middle than at the edge), each about 3 to 4 inches in diameter. Place bialys on prepared baking sheets, cover with plastic wrap, and let rise an additional 30 minutes or until increased by about half in bulk (don’t let them over-rise).
- Make an indention in the center of each bialy with two fingers of each hand, pressing from the center outward, leaving a 1-inch rim.
- Place approximately 1 teaspoon of Onion Topping in the hole of each bialy.
- Dust lightly with flour, cover with plastic wrap, and let rise 15 minutes.
- Preheat oven to 425 degrees F.
- Bake on upper and lower shelves of the oven for 6 to 7 minutes, then switch pans and reverse positions of pans (front to back), and bake another 5 to 6 minutes until bialys are lightly browned.
- NOTE: These are soft rolls, and it is important not to bake them too long or they will be very dry.
- Remove from oven and let cool on wire racks.
- After cooling, immediately place in a plastic bag (this will allow the exterior to soften slightly).
- NOTE: These rolls are best eaten fresh, preferably lightly toasted and smeared with cream cheese. For longer storage, keep in the freezer.
- Makes 8 bialys.
Soupe a l’oignon Lyonnaise
An unmissable classic that won’t disappoint – the onions melt into a buttery beef broth enriched with cream and egg and topped with grilled cheese.