Here, the most cynical moments in an already hugely cynical film involve vigorous kowtowing towards the People’s Republic. Angelababy (a star in Hong Kong) is unceremoniously presented to one of the film’s bland top guns as something close to a love interest. Later on, during one of his trademark worldwide annihilations, Emmerich moves from another blasting of Tower Bridge to a levelling of some blameless Chinese city.
Roland makes bad films, but he is no fool. It is only a few weeks since the even worse Warcraft broke records in China.
Anyway, even Gainsbourg’s delightful oddball delivery can’t save the film from descent into incoherent mulch. After 90 minutes of being prodded, the mysterious ball eventually decides to tell us everything in perfect English.Is it from the Planet Tellnotshow? How much money will this dreadful film make? Will the sequels go on forever? Look to the east, puny humans.